


When The Right One Comes Along

by mysoulmateisactuallycarbs



Category: Pitch Perfect (Movies)
Genre: F/F, Fluff and Angst
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-03-30
Updated: 2020-04-08
Packaged: 2021-03-01 03:41:08
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 7,881
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23388274
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mysoulmateisactuallycarbs/pseuds/mysoulmateisactuallycarbs
Summary: When Chloe brazenly and just completely out of the blue asks Beca why they aren’t dating each other, it completely takes the brunette off guard. She’s can’t ever remember a moment when she’s ever been so confused and simultaneously intrigued all at the same time….it is Chloe, after all. She types up a quick reply, doing her best not to ignore the redhead’s question but not still vague enough to not fully answer it either…not over a text message, anyway.The more she thinks about it, Beca just can’t get it off of her mind.Why don’t they just date each other?
Relationships: Chloe Beale/Beca Mitchell
Comments: 16
Kudos: 94





	1. That's Where It Is

**Author's Note:**

> Something that popped into my head and I couldn't get rid of it. 
> 
> PP3 doesn't exist in this AU.

Chloe plops down onto the couch in her New York apartment, blindly reaching out for her phone with one hand and the remote with the other. She powers on the tv and navigates to Netflix, opting to sift through the few notifications on her phone while she waits for it all to load. Instagram is first, mainly because she posted the last picture a few hours ago from her road trip with Jessica and Aubrey and it’s been steadily blowing up since it was posted. Once those are clear and she’s responded to the few comments from her friends, Chloe moves onto Snapchat. Tapping the yellow ghost icon to open the app, she finds that she has a few unopened snaps and Beca happens to be the first one on the list. Chloe taps on the unopened snap and can’t help but laugh a little at the image of Beca sprawled out in the middle of her living room floor with the caption “send help, it’s hot as fuck.”

Chloe shakes her head and moves to reply, sticking her tongue out in the picture before she adds her own caption. “Punishment for not coming on our road trip!”

“That’s not fair, Chlo,” is the response Chloe receives in a matter of minutes via iMessage. “I’m on the opposite coast working. Or at least I was working until this blackout happened,” Chloe reads, tapping on the message and selecting the thumbs down option before she types up a reply of her own.

“I’m back in New York as of a few hours ago. Why don’t you just pack up and come to me?” Chloe suggests, knowing that Beca was supposed to be coming to New York to work in a few days anyway and presses send.

“Do you have any idea how fucking difficult it is to pack in the dark, Beale?” comes Beca’s response and Chloe simply shakes her head. “Your phone has a flashlight, dumbass. I’m not above sending Aubrey over to help you,” Chloe retorts, sinking back into the cushions of her couch as her phone chimes again.

“Aubrey isn’t going to be much help considering packing with your iPhone flashlight can really only get you so far,” she reads, rolling her eyes as she prepares to type back.

“That would be two flashlights though,” Chloe sends, brows furrowing in thought for a moment before she types out another reply. “You’re supposed to be here in like three days? Why haven’t you packed already?” Chloe chides, knowing how long it generally takes for Beca to get her shit together anyway; she’s usually more put together by this point.

“I never said I wasn’t packed,” is all Beca says which prompts Chloe to go back to Snapchat and snap a picture of herself leveling Beca with her best glare. Her phone pings twice in response, alerting her of a new snap as well as an iMessage. She opens the snap first, rolling her eyes a little at the video Beca sent of herself shrugging before she moves on to the iMessage where Beca has in fact sent her proof of opened suitcases that appear to be mostly filled with her things.

“Finish and come to me,” Chloe types, knowing the brunette would be more comfortable here than in Los Angeles with no power, “you’ll be here in a couple of days anyway and at least this way, you’ll have electricity.”

The year had been interesting for the both of them mostly because they haven’t seen each other, aside from the regularly scheduled FaceTime call, in nearly four months.

Beca managed to get her foot in the door at Red Label Records and after a few successful interviews, she was in negotiations to enter into a production contract. Chloe, on the other hand, ended up being cast in an indie film - she heard about an open casting call in LA, where she’d relocated with the intention of attending vet school, and singlehandedly beat out everyone else for the audition - surprising everyone, including herself. She didn’t expect to fall in love with acting, but it was one of the easiest things that Chloe had ever done. It just felt right.

Sure, loving your job has its perks. Chloe loves that she can wake up every morning to go to work and it not feel like work. The downside is that it takes up so much of her time that she has to make more of a conscious effort to spend time with her friends outside of work. It’s been difficult, something Chloe attributes to having so many friends spread out across the world in very different lines of work, but she honestly wouldn’t trade it for the world. She’s happy, her friends are happy...there’s really not much else Chloe could ask for.

The ping of her iMessage tone brings Chloe out of her reverie and she picks up her phone where it had settled onto her lap at some point during her mind’s wandering, swiping at the screen to open Beca’s latest message.

“Fine...but only because I might actually suffocate if I stay here any longer.”Chloe snorts out a laugh and shakes her head, typing out her reply and hitting send.

“I can’t do much with my CPR certification if you stay. And we both know that you’re absolutely never allowed to die on me. Book a flight and get here, please and thank you.”

“You’re so weird,” Chloe reads a few seconds later, giggling at the expected response as she watches the three little dots reappear on her screen to let her know that Beca is typing again.

“See you soon, Chlo.”

* * *

Chloe finds herself in a similar position the next day, the added bonus of a margarita in hand, while aimlessly scrolling through her Netflix options until she settles on a movie that she’s seen enough times to quote. It’s fine though; the tv is mostly on to drown out the almost eerie silence of her apartment. She’s not sure if the tequila is what is getting to her or if it’s just genuine curiosity that makes her pick up her phone and decide to text Beca again.

“OKAY I HAVE A QUESTION,” is what she types and ultimately decides to send before she can fully talk herself out of it, reaching for her drink on the table to her left and taking a long sip.

“WHAT’S UP HOE?” is Beca’s response and it’s enough to have Chloe giggling that Beca chose to at least pretend to mimic her enthusiasm, knowing that the brunette probably typed it with a straight face.

It takes her a few minutes to get the words right and she reads them over again for several seconds before ultimately deciding to hit send. She knows that she can’t take it back, but she also realizes that she doesn’t want to.

“You’re single. I’m single. We’ve been friends for nearly a decade. We’ve seen each other naked. And we’ve even kissed which I know was mostly under the influence, but for all purposes of this conversation, it counts,” Chloe sends, quickly typing out a second message to accompany it. “So, why don’t we just date each other?”

Chloe sinks further into her seat and blindly reaches for her drink again, taking another long sip of the liquid. Her eyes never leave her phone screen, feeling the butterflies swirl to life in her stomach as she watches her message go from delivered to read. She can feel her heart race and fall in rapid succession as those three little dots appear and disappear on the screen, letting her know that Beca is actually typing out a reply.

“I..Chlo, are you okay? That was really, really random,” she reads, swallowing hard at the lump of emotion that’s already formed in her throat before she can even get through the remainder of the message, “I mean I know we’ve sort of talked about it but this is still so, so random. Can we just table this conversation for now and maybe talk about it in person when I see you tomorrow?”

She’s not entirely sure what to make of it all, biting down on her lower lip as she reads over the text a few more times before she ultimately types out a reply.

“Yeah, okay. That’s fine,” Chloe responds after a moment, watching over the screen again as her message is immediately delivered and read, and she tilts her head a bit as the little dots signaling an impending reply appear once more.

“Also for the sake of being completely transparent, I haven’t been single that long...just over a month. And really, I don’t even consider it an actual relationship,” Chloe reads, brows furrowing at this new bit of information, but she doesn’t get a chance to ask any questions because Beca has already sent another message.

“But I’m not saying no, okay? I just think this is something we should talk about more in-depth and preferably in person, not over a phone screen. That’s all.”

Chloe honestly doesn’t really know what to fully unpack first: that Beca somehow managed to hide a relationship or the fact that she isn’t telling Chloe no. She’s not sure that she’s ever felt the urge to throw up and squeal all at the same time. Her phone buzzes again, Beca’s name popping up on the screen once more and swipes open the message.

“But anyway, I’m going to bed. My flight leaves at eight in the morning. I’ll see you when I land. Goodnight, Chlo.”

“Sweet dreams, Becs. I’ll see you soon.”

* * *

Chloe sprints down the stairs of her Manhattan apartment and rounds the corner in a full on run, nearly colliding with the wall in her attempt to answer the door. She doesn’t waste another second as she pulls open the door, her face lighting up in a smile so wide that her cheeks immediately begin to ache with the force of it as she throws her arms around the tiny brunette on the other side. “Four months is so fucking long,” Chloe responds even though she knows that she really doesn’t need an explanation.

“Jesus, Chloe,” Beca can’t help but laugh as the redhead barrels into her, instantly sliding her arms around Chloe and giving a single nod of her head in agreement. “FaceTime just isn’t the same.”

“Nope,” Chloe agrees, reluctantly pulling herself off of Beca and grabbing one of the brunette’s bags before she nudges Beca back inside of the apartment ahead of her and pushes the door closed behind them.

“Come on,” Chloe says after a few moments, pushing Beca’s things out of the way, knowing that they could be taken upstairs later. “Get comfortable and we can order food or really whatever else you want to do,” Chloe shrugs, wandering into the living room and plopping down onto one side of the couch.

“I’m easy to please, Beale,” Beca responds easily, taking the seat on the couch opposite Chloe and angling herself so that she can see the redhead, flashing her a soft smile. “Missed you,” Beca admits after a moment, “I’m really looking forward to being back in the same city with you for a while.”

“You absolutely have your partner in crime back to do shit with,” Chloe laughs, tilting her head to meet Beca’s eyes with a smile. “New York is a city we haven’t explored together yet. We’ve been here plenty of time over the years, but never together.

“We’re going to have so much fun,” Beca nods in agreement as she mirrors the redhead’s smile.

A comfortable silence settles over the pair and Chloe automatically feels at fault, inwardly wondering if her question from the previous day has anything to do with it. She squirms a little in her seat and eventually settles in a more position so that she can see Beca better, trying to figure out exactly what she wants to say to try to address the elephant in the room.

“Not to make things awkward because we can totally just pretend nothing happened,” she begins, silently hoping that Beca doesn’t decide to take her up on this option, “but does this mean we can talk now since I dropped a metaphorical bomb on you.”

It takes Beca a few moments to respond because it would be so, so easy to just sweep it under the rug and forget that it ever happened. But she did tell Chloe that they would talk about it and she knows that she owes Chloe an explanation. Beca sighs and nods again, tilting her head to find Chloe’s eyes. “Yeah, we can do that now.”

“I know I’m the one who instigated this conversation, but I’ve got to be honest and say that I’m not entirely sure where to start,” Chloe replies with a small shrug. “Especially since I honestly had no idea that you were dating anyone. And that’s not to say that it’s a big deal, because it’s not,” Chloe both clarifies and rambles, shaking her head and laughing a little at the way this is coming out. “This isn’t weird...but it’s a little weird.”

“I’m not dating anyone,” Beca responds the second Chloe finishes her thought, though the words come out slowly. “It was a fling really and we broke up after a couple of weeks,” Beca explains, closing her eyes and shaking her head. “I was once again deemed too unavailable to be in a relationship,” she adds, shaking her head against the lump forming in her throat at the thought. Sighing, Beca pushes herself up off of the couch and makes her way over to the window where she gently rests her forehead against the glass, watching the city through the pouring rain.

“It keeps happening. I’m too unavailable for people, she murmurs after a moment. “Like I’m sorry that I have a job where I have to travel, and I stay insanely busy, I can’t help that. But it really fucking sucks. It makes me feel so alone. It’s like I’m not worth waiting for, no one wants to wait for me to come home.”

Chloe pushes herself up from the couch and immediately makes her way over to the window, to Beca, and gently wraps her arms around the brunette in a comforting hug without a second thought. “What happened?” Chloe wonders, knowing Beca well enough to know that there has to be a story; something had to happen for Beca to get to this level of defeated because Chloe isn’t sure that she’s ever seen Beca like this.

“Honestly? I barely even know,” the brunette responds and Chloe swears that she can feel the way Beca closes in on herself. “It’s like you try for a relationship with someone you thought you knew, someone you considered to be one of your best friends, but you’re busy. So then they tell you ‘oh hey, you’re too busy for me, this just isn’t going to work out...’” Beca trails off, swallowing hard and it takes her a few moments to breathe through the emotions before she can continue. “And then, not even a week later, you see them with someone else.”

“God,” Chloe murmurs, absentmindedly tightening her hold on Beca and pulling the brunette impossibly closer. “You deserve so much better than that.”

“I don’t deserve anything,” Beca retorts, rolling her eyes despite knowing that Chloe can’t see her face.

“Not true, Becs. Not even a little bit true,” Chloe is quick to interject, maneuvering between Beca and the window, just to try to get the brunette’s attention, knowing that Beca is doing everything she can to try to keep her emotions from getting the best of her. “You can’t blame yourself for the other person being an asshole. This bitch used your career as an excuse to move onto someone else and nothing, not a fucking thing, about that is fair,” she adds, vehemently shaking her head. “You deserve somebody who is going to support your insane schedule, not someone who’s going to use it as an excuse to not even try. That’s not even a remotely fair to you, babe.”

Beca bites down hard on her bottom lip and focuses her eyes out the window, doing her best to look at anything other than at Chloe. “But that’s what it’s always going to be, Chlo,” she adds resolutely. “I’ve been working my ass off at Red Label for five years now. I’m doing things and working with people that I only ever dreamed about for so fucking long, and I’m not going to accept an ultimatum - or anything even remotely close to that - because that isn’t fair to me. I love my life, it’s what I’ve always wanted, I’m literally living my dream. I never had a backup plan; even with a college degree that I was forced to get, I still never wanted to do anything else,” Beca recounts, furiously bringing a hand up and swiping at a tear that she can feel forming on her right eye. “But nobody seems to fucking grasp this or the fact that I need to keep myself busy because I have to work; the anxiety that comes with just thinking that I could fuck this up and lose everything that I’ve worked for is more than enough motivation to push myself that much harder. But even at that, I shouldn’t have to fucking choose my job or a relationship. I should be allowed to have both. Everybody else can have both. Why the fuck can’t I?” Beca wonders, mostly to herself even though she’s talking aloud, allowing her eyes to briefly meet Chloe’s before averting her gaze back to the window, refusing to break.

Chloe moves further into the brunette’s line of sight, further enveloping Beca into her arms because she just can’t not...not when she knows how close to her breaking point that Beca is.

“You shouldn’t have to choose, Bec,” Chloe reiterates, ever so slightly tightening her hold on Beca. “And anybody who makes you feel obligated to pick one or the other isn’t the person for you. You’re allowed to have a relationship _and_ a career,” she continues, aimlessly combing her fingers through the ends of brown hair, keeping the brunette close.

Beca nods in lieu of an immediate reply, still avidly refraining from hugging Chloe back; though at this point, she really couldn’t figure out why that was. She knew that she needed to keep herself in check for the next few weeks. She was in New York for work and the last thing she wanted to be was a basket case for the duration that she was here...though, at this point, she wasn’t entirely too sure how that would be achievable.

“No, I shouldn’t have to,” she finally agrees. “But the world is filled with Jesse’s and Lauren’s and people who just can’t handle your power,” Beca adds angrily, never taking her eyes off of the storm brewing outside.

Chloe can’t help the flash of anger that sizzles through her system at the names that Beca mentioned, immediately followed by the tiniest hint of surprise that comes with finding out that Lauren is who Beca had been referring to the whole time. It’s basically Jesse all over again or, at least, that’s what it sounded like to Chloe.

Much to Chloe’s dismay, Beca and Jesse actually moved in together after graduation. He didn’t have a problem building up a fairly successful career of his own. And initially, it was fine. They got acclimated to the unconventional aspect that comes having demanding careers, but it was never enough for Jesse. It got to the point that they were having the same fight over and over again: he never could understand why Beca always had to be so busy but he never wanted to compromise, he wanted her to be the one to compromise so that nothing had to change for him. It was always unresolved, neither of them was willing to do what the other wanted.

And then one day, it was over. Jesse finally got tired of it all and it gutted Beca. Six years of her life down the drain for nothing. Realistically, Beca knew that it wouldn’t really go anywhere but it didn’t make it hurt any less.

It was made even worse when she found out through the social media grapevine that Jesse had actually cheated on her.

The whole situation was a total nightmare and Chloe was there with Beca through all of it.

“Your person is out there, Beca,” Chloe eventually murmurs, not at all caring how cliché she sounds because it doesn’t make it any less true. “It hasn’t worked out yet..,” Chloe trails off, shaking her head, “the reason it hasn’t worked out yet is because it hasn’t been right, Bec.” She lifts her head to meet Beca’s eyes, gently bringing a hand up to cup Beca’s jaw, forcing the brunette to hold her gaze even if it’s just for a moment. “The right person isn’t going to make you choose. The right person is going to support you through everything. They’re going to make time to come see you even when you’re both busy. They’re going to talk to you in some form every day because you’re important enough to them that they can’t go more than a couple of hours without talking to you. The right person is going to make all of this other shit worth it because the good with them is enough to outweigh all of the bad with anyone else.”

Beca listened, knowing Chloe was absolutely right, but it didn’t change how stoic and numb she felt on the inside. She cursed under her breath as she felt tears welling up in her eyes again, pulling out of Chloe’s grip while simultaneously spinning back around away from Chloe, and furiously swiping at them before they have a chance to leave trails across her cheeks.

“But you’re my person,” she hears herself say and it startles her because it’s not her usual, nonchalant, almost automatic response.

Something about a phrase she’s used so many times over the eight years that she and Chloe have known each other rings truer in this moment than it ever has. Chloe has stood by her side through laughter, through tears, through heartbreak...through everything, even though Beca never asked her to; Chloe just did.

And suddenly, it hits her.

The realization is enough to have Beca spinning back around to face Chloe, properly meeting her eyes for the first time since this whole conversation began.

“You’re my person. It’s you.”


	2. No Doubt In My Mind Where You Belong

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “You never really realize that what you want and what you need is literally standing right there in front of you,” Beca says after another moment, feeling the near perpetual frown she’s adorned since this conversation began - if she’s honest with herself, it’s been there longer than that - lifting ever so slightly.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter title is from Adele's Make You Feel My Love

“You’re my person. It’s you,” Beca can’t help but repeat, shaking her head incredulously, closing her eyes as she tries to wrap her mind around something so simple and yet so profound. “It’s always been you. Why am I so fucking stupid? Oh my god,” she half laughs. “You never really realize that what you want and what you need is literally standing right there in front of you,” Beca says after another moment, feeling the near perpetual frown she’s adorned since this conversation began - if she’s honest with herself, it’s been there longer than that - lifting ever so slightly.

“That’s pretty much the same epiphany I had that led me to the word vomit question earlier,” Chloe responds easily with a quiet laugh as she takes a couple of steps forward to move closer to Beca. “It makes so much sense,” she adds honestly, shrugging her shoulders ever so slightly with the admission, meeting Beca’s eyes.

“But Chlo,” Beca murmurs, feeling her cheeks redden with the redhead’s admission, shaking her head a little as if it’s going to with that at all and ultimately dropping her gaze to the floor. “What if we decided to pursue something and it didn’t work out? What if it ruined our friendship?” she asked, lifting her head briefly to meet Chloe’s eyes, lowering it again. “I can’t lose you.”

Chloe simply shakes her head, drifting ever closer to Beca, drawn to her like she always has been, blue eyes locking on blue. “It wouldn’t happen,” she responds softly but firmly. “Even if we did decide to pursue something and we crash and burn, you’re still always going to be stuck with me, Becs. Leaving you is never an option. I’m entirely too attached to you for that.”

Beca regards her for a moment, before ultimately turning her attention back to the window. She had been through enough heartbreak in her life combined with so many people leaving her that she didn’t immediately jump at Chloe’s words, even if it did make her feel immensely guilty. “You’re the only person who’s bothered to stay. You’re the only constant I have in my life. I just can’t lose you, Chlo,” Beca quietly repeats, balancing herself on the windowsill and resting her temple against the cool glass, doing everything possible to ignore how loud the rapid thump of her heartbeat resounded in her ears.

Chloe pauses and closes her eyes, blowing out a deep breath before she can continue. It would be so easy to get angry, to argue with Beca in this moment, but she knows that it wouldn’t do any good. She knows that she has to choose her words carefully; she can count on one hand the number of times that she’s seen Beca be this open around her and the last thing she wants to do is to take advantage of that.

“I don’t know why you think that I would just abandon you if this doesn’t work out. You’re my best friend, Beca, and you always will be. That’s something that isn’t ever going to change,” Chloe remarks before she absently brings a hand up to gently brush a strand of dark hair behind Beca’s ear, lingering there a little longer than she probably should but she just can’t make herself pull away. “And if this is something that we do decide to move forward with, I’m telling you right now, you need to know that I am all in. It’s you or nobody else, Bec. There is nobody else.”

“I know. I know all of these things, Chlo,” Beca responds, swallowing hard against the lump of emotion forming in her throat. “But you know me. You know how I get with relationships. You know that I throw all of myself into them and every single time I am the one who’s gotten hurt. It’s a never-ending cycle. An exasperated sigh slips past the brunette’s lips, briefly biting on her bottom lip as she struggles with what she wants to say. “And Chlo, you have to know - I know that you know - I love you. I love you with all that I have to give, but the thought of losing you...the thought of us falling into this same shitty cycle that I can’t seem to break...I don’t know how I could ever recover from that,” she whispers, closing her eyes against the tears that she can feel forming in the corners of her eyes, as if willing them not to fall. She doesn’t know when she had become so broken. Plastering on a façade and hiding behind a sarcasm and fake enthusiasm for the world to see had just become second nature. “I haven’t been genuinely happy in so long...”

“This is me, right now, telling you that you aren’t going to lose me, Beca,” Chloe tries again, feeling a lot like a broken record at this point, but she can’t say it enough as she pushes into Beca’s personal space and slips her index finger under Beca’s chin, gently lifting so that Chloe can meet her eyes, knowing her own are a little glassy as well.

“Beca,” she murmurs, just loud enough to get the brunette’s attention, affectionately smoothing her thumb along Beca’s cheek, offering the brunette a soft smile once her eyes finally open. “Nothing you could ever do is going to push me away, baby,” Chloe soothes, sliding her free hand over Beca’s and squeezing gently, moving the other up to affectionately comb through Beca’s hair. “I love you too, Becs. And I know that you know I do and that I have for so long. You’re my person, Beca. I’m not just going to wake up one day and decide that I’m done with you,” she adds, scrunching up her nose at the thought and shaking her head. “I don’t even know how to explain it but it’s like we are so connected that you’re a part of me, somehow. And I know that’s cliché and cheesy, but it’s the truth. Losing you isn’t an option.”

“We’ve always been that way. I’ve always felt it,” Beca murmurs, averting her eyes from Chloe’s once again and focusing on their joined hands instead. It would be so easy to just flip her hand over to twine her fingers with Chloe’s, but she can’t; not yet. “I’m just so scared,” Beca confesses in a voice barely loud enough to be heard.

Somewhere deep down, Beca knew that Chloe was telling her the truth, that she would never leave, just like Beca knows that Chloe loves her - Chloe has for years. She isn’t quite sure that she can pinpoint the moment their friendship shifted into this limbo of not quite more but not quite friends, but Beca does know that it has everything to do with Chloe. And that’s not to say that their relationship is one-sided, because it isn’t; it absolutely isn’t.

For as long as Beca can remember, the people that she’s let into her life have left to the point where it was easier to just not let anyone in. And then she met Chloe. It took time, but Chloe persisted and somehow snuck her way through the carefully crafted walls around Beca’s heart. Chloe helped her realize that it was okay to let people in. People came and went but there was still Chloe, always there to help Beca pick and reassemble the pieces.

But there’s only so many times that pieces can be reassembled before they don’t fit together anymore.

Beca flips over her hand, hesitating only briefly before she carefully laces her fingers through Chloe’s, shifting around on the windowsill so that she can see Chloe a little bit better and softly squeezing the redhead’s hand.

“You’re the only person left that I trust anymore, and you know that doesn’t come easily. I can honestly say that I’m more closed off now than I ever was before. But I love you, Chlo,” Beca responds, aimlessly toying with their joined fingers. “I want to be with you. But I need you to be patient with me because I can honestly say that I’m not even the same person I was even a few weeks ago,” she added, glancing down once more. She couldn’t figure out why she felt the need to be so formal and reserved around Chloe, of all people; it didn’t make sense, but it’s all she could handle.

Chloe gives a single nod of her head and squeezes Beca’s hand in responds before she drops it all together. Instead, Chloe gently frames Beca’s face in both hands, tenderly swirling her thumbs along Beca’s cheeks before leaning in and pressing a tender kiss to Beca’s forehead - feeling the way Beca’s breathing stops at the contact - lingering there.

“Nothing you can possibly do will ever make me walk away from this,” Chloe breathes against her skin, remaining there even as she continues to speak. “I will always love you and nothing will ever change that. Whatever you need from me, I’m here,” Chloe adds, pressing another kiss against Beca’s forehead simply because she can.

“I know that, I know all of this,” Beca starts, shaking her head once Chloe has moved away. “And it’s not that I don’t trust you, because I do. I love you. I always have...you know all of this Chloe,” Beca counters; the sound of Chloe’s full name rolling off of her tongue feeling foreign and abnormal, but she doesn’t question it. “But all of those walls that you bulldozed through are back and they’re higher than ever. And I feel so numb and just generally untrusting of everything, but I don’t want you to take it personally, because it’s not you,” she adds, still rambling, because she can’t seem to stop. “I’ve given my whole heart out twice just to have it handed back to me in pieces. You were there when Jesse broke up with me. You were there the moment that I figured out he cheated and then tried to beg me to take him back....so many people have broken my trust this year...I just don’t have any more to give out.”

“Baby, I’m not questioning you,’ Chloe interjects the moment she can, because Beca needs to understand that. “Your reasons are valid. I don’t care what anyone else has to say about it because they are; they always are. I understand, Becs. Whatever you need from me, okay? I’m not going anywhere.”

“I know, I know all of that,” Beca quipped, lightly scratching at her arm, feeling the anxiety and frustration starting to creep in. “I want this. I want you.”

“It’s okay, Becs,” Chloe answers, gently smoothing her hand along Beca’s arm for a moment before stepping back, putting a little bit of distance between them solely for Beca’s sake. “I know where you stand, and you know where I stand. We’re doing this your way, babe. Take your time, I promise it’s okay,” Chloe emphasizes, not wanting Beca to feel pressured into anything. “I’m gonna take your stuff upstairs. Find us a movie to watch?” Chloe requests with a smile, already moving back toward the doorway to collect Beca’s things and hauling them up the stairs toward the bedrooms.

Beca frowns and lightly chews on her lower lip, genuinely feeling so guilty that Chloe - Chloe, of all people - feels the need to give her space, following the redhead with her eyes until she’s completely out of Beca’s line of vision. Sighing to herself, Beca pushes off of the windowsill and makes her way over to the couch. Once she’s sitting, she finds the remote and pulls up Chloe’s Prime Video app on the tv. She eventually settles on something and curls up in her corner of the couch, hearing footsteps on the stairs a few seconds later.

“So, what are we watching?” Chloe asks, plopping down onto the couch opposite Beca and turning to meet Beca’s eyes.

Beca looked up at Chloe and managed a small smile, though she knew Chloe can see right through her, gesturing to the tv with the remote still in her hand. “Harry Potter,” Beca smirks as she presses play, letting her head rest against the back of the couch.

“Oooooh, marathon, I wholeheartedly approve,” Chloe beams, flashing the brunette a wide smile before she reaches beside her for the blanket that’s folded over the arm of her side of the couch and shakes it out for a moment before draping it over Beca, knowing she’ll be more comfortable that way.

Beca forced a smile as she allowed herself to get comfortable on the couch, feeling her stomach churn at the whole situation in discontent. She hated how she couldn’t get out of her head and curl up to Chloe on the couch while they watched the movie like they’ve done so many times before and especially hated that she felt like she was terrified of everything. “Thanks,” she managed after a moment, feeling her head spin with the knowledge that she wasn’t acting anything like herself and knowing that Chloe was aware of it as well.

“Relax, baby. It’s okay,” Chloe soothes, settling into her own corner of the couch, glancing over to Beca.

“I know it is. I just can’t explain it,” Beca sighs, knowing her face is bright red with how awkward she feels over the entire situation, nervously playing with one of the bracelets on her wrist. “I don’t like this, I don’t want to feel like this,” she sighed, burrowing further under the blanket and closing her eyes.

Chloe observes the brunette for a moment, humming thoughtfully, knowing that Beca is just so in her head that she can’t seem to snap herself out of it. “Gonna try something. If it doesn’t help, then it doesn’t help, but it’s worth a good college try,” Chloe announces, sliding over to Beca’s side of the couch and pauses, patiently waiting to gauge Beca’s reaction. “Here, sit up a second.”

Beca raises her eyebrows at the action, sitting up a bit. “What are you doing?” she asked hesitantly, though she did as she was told, silently hating how uncomfortable she felt in her own skin.

“Sitting,” Chloe replies easily, moving off of the couch and into the spot that Beca just made available, sliding a pillow into her lap. “And now you can lay back down.”

Beca freezes and swallows hard, shaking her head a little before jumping up from the couch altogether as the panic fully sets in. “I can’t.” And it’s all she can manage, before she’s backing out of the room and darting up the stairs, pushing the bathroom door shut behind her, immediately sinking to the floor and curling up with her legs against her chest and letting her forehead rest against her knees.

She had absolutely no idea how to explain what she was feeling, barely registering the tears that rolled down her cheeks, but she knew something else was going on.

Chloe gives Beca a moment before eventually following after her, lightly knocking on the bathroom door. “Beca? I didn’t mean to scare you, babe.”

When an answer doesn’t come, Chloe frowns and presses her ear up against the bathroom door, knowing something is off without even being able to fully comprehend exactly what is going on. “What can I do, Becs?”

“Nothing,” Beca manages to choke out, doing her best to stop crying and failing miserably considering she couldn’t even pinpoint the cause of the meltdown so she logically couldn’t see how Chloe being there would help.

“I don’t like that answer,” Chloe sighs, eventually propping up against the empty wall in front of the bathroom door and sliding down it to sit, deciding that she can at least stay even if she can’t help.

Beca pulls her legs up tighter to her chest just as a loud sob slips past her lips out without her meaning for it too. Shaking her head, the brunette immediately claps a hand over her mouth, feeling the anxiety rising as the last few months bubbled back to the surface and she forced her eyes to close against it, willing it away as she tried to calm herself down.

“Breathe,” Chloe calls out from the other side of the door, having already moved back to stand in front of it, knowing Beca can hear her. “I’m right here. You’re not alone in this, no matter what it feels like, okay? I know you can hear me, Bec. Focus on me, okay?”

Beca listens as best as she can, sounds growing increasingly muffled through her ears, vehemently shaking her head. “I can’t,” she forced out, balling her hands into fists, silently cursing at her inability to convey her feelings.

“Move away from the door, babe,” Chloe requests. “Just a little bit, let me in,” she tries, knowing that she isn’t going be able to be any good for Beca from outside the door.

Chloe waits a moment and presses her ear against the door, faintly hearing movement on the other side. Once it stops, she pushes open the door and steps inside, gently easing down up against the tub beside Beca. “Not letting you have an anxiety attack by yourself,” Chloe mumbles and immediately wraps a hand around one of Beca’s. “I’m here, Bec. Whether you want me to be or not, I’m here.”

Beca silently nodded, knowing that if she even tried to talk she would start crying again.

“Don’t have to talk,” Chloe murmurs, releasing Beca’s hand in favor of sliding her arm around the brunette’s shoulders, fingers aimlessly finding their way into brown hair. “Just gonna sit here until you feel like you can move. And then we’ll go lay down, with a movie or without a movie, your choice, until you fall asleep.

Beca closed her eyes and let her head drop to Chloe’s shoulder with tears still rolling down her cheeks. “I feel empty,” she managed, unable to say much more than that. Her breathing still came in short, sharp gasps, but having someone familiar close by was comforting.

Chloe moves her free hand up to Beca’s face and gently swipes at the tears on her cheeks, continuing to play with Beca’s hair. “Understandable, babe,” Chloe responds, not wanting to push her into talking about anything unless she wants to.

Silence fills the room after that, Beca remains curled up to Chloe and closes her eyes, blindly reaching for Chloe’s free hand and squeezing tightly, not letting go.

“I got you,” Chloe murmurs, stroking her thumb along Beca’s hand in soothing patterns. “Not going anywhere,” she promises, absentmindedly pressing her lips to the crown of Beca’s head and feeling her nod in response.

* * *

“Think you’re up for moving this to bed?” Chloe asks, looking down at Beca where she’s sprawled out across her lap a few moments later, smoothing her fingers through Beca’s hair. She takes Beca’s nod for a yes and, as carefully as she can manage, she shifts Beca to sit back up against the tub. Once Beca is sitting, Chloe pushes herself up to stand and reaches for Beca’s hands to help her up and immediately wraps the tiny brunette into a tight hug. She uses their slight height difference to her advantage, awkwardly walking with Beca against her until they’re back into her bedroom and easing onto the bed with Beca sprawled out on top of her.

“If you decide you want to talk, you can,” Chloe murmurs, unsure of what’s going through Beca’s mind at the moment. “But you aren’t obligated to. If anything makes you uncomfortable, just tell me,” she adds, lightly toying with the ends of Beca’s hair. “Still not leaving.”

“I thought throwing myself into everything would be enough to forget,” Beca says after a moment, still torn between feeling like she was overreacting and not feeling anything at all. “But nothing can make it go away. Because once I’m not busy, it creeps up again and it constantly hurts.”

“Baby, this isn’t your fault,” Chloe murmurs, hugging Beca a little bit tighter. “You don’t deserve any of this.”

“But it is,” Beca responds automatically, rolling so that she was back on her side, facing the wall. “Everyone always leaves because they can’t handle my life and it’s just so fucking pathetic because I always come home to them.”

“You always come home to me though,” Chloe points out. “And that doesn’t include the countless hours of FaceTime, phone calls, and spontaneous meet ups wherever one of us might be, no matter how busy we both are.”

“Which is my point,” Beca retorts. “I always come home. I keep my promises. I always come back no matter what. People just can’t handle it. I know my life is crazy, I know I have a lot going on, but I’m loyal and I keep my word.”

“Which proves that it’s their problem and not yours,” Chloe quips, choosing not to dwell on the fact that the point she had been trying to make was completely ignored. “You haven’t done anything. Being busy isn’t a crime. Having a career isn’t a crime. You shouldn’t have to pick between your job and your person, not when you can easily have both.”

“I don’t have this issue with you, Chlo,” Beca murmurs, rolling onto her opposite side so that she can face her, needing Chloe to know that everything that she is complaining about still has nothing to do with Chloe. “You are unconditionally there without question, just like you know I am. But it just makes a person feel worthless garbage when you give someone your all and you get nothing back but a fucking goodbye.”

“I know,” Chloe responds, reaching out a hand to splay across Beca’s hip and rubbing soothing circles against the skin there.

Beca closes her eyes before she rolls completely into Chloe, nestling her head against Chloe’s chest and breathing out a shaky sigh.

Chloe can’t help but smile at the action, as she slides her arms around Beca, cradling the brunette to her.

“I’m just really, really done with everything,” Beca mumbles, closing her eyes as she buries her face into Chloe.

“I know you are, and you have every right to be,” Chloe agrees, affectionately peppering kisses into Beca’s hair simply because she can, not really seeing a point in holding back anymore.

Beca curled more into Chloe; it was almost instinctive at this point, cuddling with Chloe whenever she needed it the most. “I don’t trust anyone with my feelings or my heart. And I know how pathetic that sounds, but I don’t.”

“Fuck them,” Chloe grumbles, tightening her hold on Beca, almost protectively so, lips brushing Beca’s temple. “They don’t deserve you any way.”

“I’m kind of at this weird standstill,” Beca said, finally pulling her head away just enough so that she can see Chloe’s face, eyes flickering up to hers. “I know what I want, but I’m a little scared to take that final jump,” she added in a quiet voice.

“You don’t have to make any rash decisions, babe,” Chloe points out, unable to resist pressing her lips to Beca’s forehead in a tender kiss, easing back to meet her eyes. “Jumping into something is always scary. It’s always good to make sure you have something to go in with or to catch you. I understand.”

Beca bit her lip as she looked up at Chloe again. “But I know this person can do that confidently. They would do anything for me. One hundred percent, I know that. It’s just...I guess, I don’t know. The whole fear of it happening again, though, I know it won’t. I just feel like I’ll always have this stupid fear,” she frowned, scrunching up her nose.

“That’s understandable, all things considered,” Chloe shrugs, affectionately carding her fingers through Beca’s hair. “Maybe just take a little more time to think about it. Decide if it’s really worth the risk. Because with the right person, it will be.”

“Oh, I’ve thought about it,” Beca responds, shifting off of Chloe ever so slightly before she snakes an arm around the redhead’s side, pulling Chloe to her. “I’ve thought about it for a very, very long time, actually. And I think it’s definitely worth the risk,” she adds with a soft hum as she pulls Chloe impossibly closer to her and gently rests her forehead against Chloe’s, feeling like everything might be actually be okay for the first time in so long.


End file.
